Thar she glows! Learn how to speak like a Spelljammer
“Thar she glows!”
Captain Ahab, Gith captain of the ship Starry Night on sighting the eye-glow of a Kindori
Ahoy there Groundlings!
Perhaps you are planning a Spelljammer campaign, about to join one as a player, or maybe your ship has already set sail into Wildspace? If so, you have come to the right place to learn how to speak like a Spelljammer.
Read on for astro-nautical-inspired slang, words, and turns of phrase that you can incorporate into your Spelljammer roleplaying… arrrrr!
Captain, Crew, and other people
Whether you are a Groundling or Starborn, you will need to learn the lingo to describe your new crew mates!
| Term / Phrase | Description |
|---|---|
| Groundling / Dirtbound | Someone with no spacefaring experience (Spelljammers equivalent of a landlubber). |
| Starborn | One who is born in Wild Space |
| Starfarer / Jammer | One who works or adventures in space |
| Spelljammer / Phlogistronaut / Helmsmaster / Coxswain | A magic user who uses a Spelljamming Helm to fly a Spelljammer |
| Skipper / Master / Cap’n | The captain of a ship (usually a separate role to the Spelljammer) |
| Crack Crew | A crew who has ventured outside their own planetary system |
| Green Crew | A crew who has not yet ventured outside their own planetary system |
| Greenie or Greenhorn | Inexperienced person on their first Wildspace voyage |
| Grockle | A slightly derogatory term used to address a traveller from a far-away land |
| Hamstermancer | Someone who has domesticated (and usually rides) a Giant Space Hamster |
| Chainmen | A term for slavers |
| Freebooter / Swashbuckler | Pirates never call themselves pirates, and instead, use one of these preferred terms |
| Privateer | A specialised pirate acting as a free agent who serves as a mercenary |
Monsters and creature-related
The creatures of space are known by many names - here are a few of them.
| Term / Phrase | Description |
|---|---|
| Snubbers | A term for Githyanki |
| Astral Attercop / Eelspider | Terms for Neogi |
| Atterbooter | A Neogi pirate |
| Atter-tatter | A derogatory term for a thief or someone who has stolen something |
| Spacegazer / Eye Tyrant | Both are terms for Beholder |
| Slavemaker / Mindfarmer / Brain Leech | Slang for Illithid / Mindflayer |
| Illisquid / Head Humper / Squidhead | Derogatory terms for mindflayers |
| Big Blue | Slang for Mercane (a race of spacefaring merchants) |
| Lighteye | Slang for Kindori |
| Schoolmaster | The largest Kindori in a pod, usually the dominant bull |
| Sucker | A young calf Kindori |
| Kindorhalers | Refers to those who hunt Kindori |
| Kindorileans | Refers to those who ride domesticated Kindori, often having built structures on their backs |
| Thar she glows! | Refers to a sighting of a Kindori, usually from the cone of light emitted from its central eye |
Your Ship and the Astral Environment
There are various turns of phrase used to describe Wildspace and the environment being sailed through below.
| Term / Phrase | Description |
|---|---|
| The Breatheasy | A word for the air envelope around a ship |
| Bubble Trouble / Breatheasy Breach | When your air envelope has been compromised |
| Fishery | An area in wildspace to be avoided, usually known to contain Scavvers |
| Star Wind | The astral wind that powers the sails of Spelljammers |
| Wild Shards | A term for asteroids |
| Gravstorm | A patch of unpredictable gravity in space, sometimes mobile |
| Slinger / Hurler | Terms meaning Mangonel (a type of ship weapon resembling a catapult) |
| Shooter | A term meaning Baillista (ship weapon resembling a large crossbow) |
| Deepsea | The space between planetary systems |
| Metrockolis | A term for a city or settlement built on an Asteroid (e.g. Bral) |
| Plum-Pudding Voyage | A term for a short or ‘tween seasons voyage into Wildspace. |
| Helmtech | A term to describe the various types of Spelljamming Helm |
| Lifejammer | A Spelljamming Helm that draws power from its wearer’s life force. Often used in slave ships. |
| Grav-line / Deckline | The plane of gravity within an Air Envelope |
| The Silver Sea | Refers to the Astral plane, an unending plane of silvery light |
Anatomy of a ship
When you are running roleplay onboard a Spelljamming ship, build in some authenticity by referring to the various areas of the vessel by their correct names.
| Term | Description |
|---|---|
| Bow | Front of the ship |
| Stern / Dungbie | The rear of the ship |
| Port | The left-hand side of the ship (When looking towards the bow) |
| Starboard | The corresponding word for the right side of the ship |
| Abaft, or Aft | Towards the back of the boat |
| Bilge | The lowest decks of the ship, often filled with filth and slime. |
| Poop Deck | The deck that is highest and farthest back (... and not the latrine!) |
| Binnacle | The place where the compass is kept on the ship |
| Crow's Nest | The place on the ship where the lookout stand is built |
| Head | Is the toilet on board the ship |
| Jacob's Ladder | The rope ladder used to climb aboard the ship |
| Rigging | The lines and ropes for the sails |
Things your angry Captain may shout at you!
| Term / Phrase | Description |
|---|---|
| Astropotamus | Slang for a Giff |
| Flapper | Slang for a Hadozee, referring to their wing-like flaps of skin used to glide |
| Star-eye | Slang for an Astral Elf |
| Slimer / Snotling | Slang for a Plasmoid |
| Bilge Bug | Slang for a Thri-Kreen |
| Talking Spanner | Slang for an Auto-Gnome |
| Bilge Hamster | A derogatory term for pretty much anyone (Bilge is the lowest part of the ship and this refers to space hamsters who have strayed there amongst the refuse and slime) |
| Hamster Gangster | A term used to put an insolent or vexatious person back in their place “Ye think yer tough as Kindori hide? Yer nothin’ but a hamster gangster!” |
| Heave ho, and put yer back into it, or ye’ll be eatin’ slumgullion for a week! | Slumgullion is the blubberous refuse from processing Kindori carcasses |
| Arr, ye smell like ye've been bathing in bilge for weeks! | A general insult. |
| Ye filthy scurvy scavver scallywag, put yer back into it! | Scallywag is a mild insult, often used affectionately. |
| Ye rotten rapscallion! | Rapscallion is another mild insult, to describe a mischievous person |
| Truly yer scabbier than a scavver’s scrotum! | When the captain has lost their rag they will pull this onerous insult from the archives. |
| An asinine asteroid has more sense than ye! | Used when someone has demonstrated incompetence |
| Have ye given yer brain to the squidheads? | Another insult for incompetence or stupidity |
| I’ve seen prettier astral attercops than ye! | A general insult |
| Ye hornswaggling atterbooter! | An insult referring to someone as a Neogi pirate / term for a thief |
| Ye scurvy scavver! | A general insult |
| Cleave him to the brisket! | To cut across the chest, from one shoulder down to the lower abdomen |
| Give ‘em a giff's welcome | Meaning to throw everything you have at them, especially artillery |
| Dead man tell no tales | When telling the crew to leave no survivors |
| Scuttle the jammer! | Order to sink a ship |
| Ye bilge-sucking blubber rubber! / Bilge sucker | A general insult referring to the filthy slime at the very bottom of the ship (the Bilge). |
| Ye lily-livered lousy layabout! | An insult for someone who displays cowardice and laziness |
| I’ll make ye dance the hempen jig! | A threat of being hanged |
| Son of a spacegazer | A derogatory term for someone you dislike |
| Savvy? | Used when asking if someone understands or agrees |
| Ye've three sheets to the astral wind, no more grog for ye! | Translates to: you are very drunk (one sheet is merry and four sheets means passed out). Grog = alcohol |
| Batten down the hatches, a gravstorm is brewing! | Put everything away and tie everything down on the ship because a gravity storm is brewing |
| Give no quarter! | Show no mercy! |
| Why do ye hang the jib laddy? We’re nearly to Bral and there’ll be plenty a fun fer all! | Hang the jib is to frown or scowl |
| Feed ‘em to the scavvers! | Order to throw someone overboard |
| You scurvy scavver bait! | A general insult |
| Yer mother was a hamster! | A common insult thrown about onboard Spelljamming ships |
Exclamations and other turns of phrase
And finally... a selection of short exclamations fit for any starborn or greenie alike!
| Term / Phrase | Description |
|---|---|
| Aaarrrggghhh! | An exclamation of disgust (not to be confused with ‘Arrrr!’ which is more accurately used to denote your piratey-ness) |
| Ahoy there, matey! / Ahoy, me hearties | A greeting |
| Avast ye space grubs! | Look over there / look at this |
| Cor blimey! | An expression of surprise |
| Astral angels, give me strength! | An expression of exasperation |
| Shiver me star-timbers! | Usually denotes surprise or shock |
| Blow me down! | Denotes surprise. Translates roughly to oh my God! |
| By the sacred light of the Kindori! | A general exclamation |
| By the belly of Bral! | A general exclamation |
| Umberlee’s underside! | A general exclamation. Umberlee is the much-feared and chaotic evil god of the sea in Faerun |
| Procan’s beard! | Procan is a lesser-known deity of the sea (from Ghosts of Saltmarsh) |
| By the blowhole of Deep Sashelas! | Deep Sashelas is an Elven god of the sea on Faerun, often manifesting as a dolphin |
| Sacred Selune! | Selune is the Faerun god of the moon and the night sky |
| By the Machinations of the Moonmaiden! | Referring to Selune or any other of the deities of the sky and stars. |
| Plenty more Scavvers in the Astral Sea | Meaning “it’s not over yet” |
| He went a-dancing with Jack Ketch | Translates to he was hanged |
| They're Scavver bait | Someone made to walk the plank, or other dying Jammer to be thrown overboard |
| Get me a clap of thunder! | Get me a strong alcoholic drink |
General advice on roleplaying in Spelljammer
There are a number of tropes you can utilise when roleplaying in a Spelljammer campaign, whether it's for your player or a DM playing an NPC.
We've covered a lot of pirate-themed ideas above, but if you prefer a more refined character, another trope to model your character on is a 17th century explorer. These upper class naval toffs would use some of the phrases below:
- Greeting: Good Morrow! / How now? / How do you fare? What cheer?
- Excuse me: Pray pardon me!
- Excellent!: Huzzah!
- Goodbye: God bye to you / Fare thee well / Pray remember me
- Addressing someone (in place of Mr / Mrs): My Goodman / My Goodlady
For this role, talk slowly and with a posh, even slightly condescending English accent whilst keeping your body language clipped and contained.
If neither of these fit the bill, then there are plenty of other tropes to consider, whether it's Viking raiders, rich merchants, or exotic travellers, the beauty of Spelljammer is that you can literally come from anywhere!
I hope you have found this useful and in the meantime, happy Spelljamming!
May the wildspace lie clear and smooth before you. May a gentle astral breeze forever fill your sails. May the starshine warm your face, and kindness warm your soul.
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